… pag tinamaan ay hwag magalit.
This is an old Filipino proverb which translates into “a stone thrown heavenward, if you get hit on its way down, don’t get mad.” (Wikipedia). As a blogger, I have learned over the years to roll with the punches, and that not everyone is going to agree with my opinion or agree with me on a social, moral or religious level.
I write to voice my opinion, not to please anyone.
The days of tiptoeing around certain sensitivities are long gone, and having found my core in literary activism, I will not stay quiet. So of course I come under fire for one article or the other, and receive quite a bit of hate mail as well. Again, this is was a conscious risk I took when I launched my first blog in March of 2010. It has been a long road, with changes in format, platform, approach, purpose, and finally conviction. There hasn`t been a day when I ever regretted having a blog. On the contrary; it has served as a wonderful coping mechanism as well as a daily (almost) writing exercise.
I have met many bloggers along the way who gave up on their own blogs because the writing became a tedious chore, or they simply ran out of steam. This, I think, is more symptomatic of their own lives rather than the writing itself, but it is not my place to say. In any case, not everyone can handle the negativity that will unavoidably trickle in with a controversial topic. My Fatophobia blogs, for example, earned me fan mail from body shaming victims around the world, as well as hate mail from people who have been body-shaming others in one way or another (keep in mind that the blog entries are automatically published on FB and Twitter, racking up a captive audience of 8000+ ). In the same manner, the last two entries on emotional abuse have also pushed a lot of buttons. Between being called a psychopath and manipulative, to being praised for having the courage to walk away, you name it, it has all passed through my screen, phone, app, in the last 24 hours.
I will not apologize to individuals who feel called out. I write in general terms, and not just from personal experience. There is substantial background research that goes into an article if it deals with a current topic, because I am no fan of unsubstantiated claims. So if you feel yourself spoken to, whether positive or negative, that is no longer my concern. I thank the fans, readers and detractors alike, especially the ones whose buttons I manage to push because that just motivates me to push on. Sometimes anger is a writer´s best friend, not love and certain social cancers need to be brought to light, exposed, in order to be addressed.