Turbulence is an unwelcome guest, but often times unavoidable. Serenity and Balance are my preferred guests but also high maintenance ones. It is so much easier to just let Turbulence in, who usually has Chaos and Confusion in tow, give them free range of the place, and allow them to do what they do best – an unholy mess.
Turbulence can be asked to leave politely, but Chaos and Confusion, when left to their own devices, like to remain invite Hurt, Disillusionment, and Frustration over as well for an extended soiree, unpleasantly rooted inside my home and soul, much to my dismay. It takes an tremendous amount of goading and prodding from Hard Work to convince them to hand over the baton to Serenity and Balance.
My cats and plants are confused by all the aforementioned visitors, in addition to Change, who loves to babysit them. Furniture has been moved, boxes filled up, loads of trash thrown, and suddenly, it is all quiet. Last December I turned the apartment upside down to accommodate my daughter, gave up my office space, made room in my closet, and found a way to fit a bed in the conservatory to turn it into a second bedroom. A few days ago I underwent the reverse process and re-arranged things to be my own space again.
I have to admit, the past months conditioned me to tight and claustrophobic living to the extent that it is a very strange feeling to have all this space back. My desk is back in the conservatory, my closet no longer crammed and cramped, and I have a wonderful meditation and prayer corner back. And I realise how much this personal space means to me now. After all, I spent the last two years building it up, accentuating every nook to be my own. My home reflects my life, an urgent need for order, structure, comfort, and a source of strength. It is full of plants, frogs, and inhabited by three flat-nosed, independent-minded cats who need the peaceful oasis just as much as I do.