When was the last time you said “yes” to yourself?
Self-care often gets a bad rap. We hear about it in terms of bubble baths, face masks, or taking a day off from work. But self-care is much deeper than just pampering yourself for an afternoon. True self-care is about nurturing your mind, body, and soul in a way that helps you grow, feel fulfilled, and set boundaries that preserve your well-being. Yet, there’s something else that many people overlook when they talk about self-care: saying yes to yourself. This isn’t about buying yourself the newest gadget or indulging in material things. It’s about allowing yourself permission to grow, to take up space, and to embrace opportunities without guilt or hesitation. It’s about setting boundaries and then learning how to break them in the most beautiful, liberating way—by saying “yes” to your own potential.
We live in a world that demands so much of us. It’s easy to feel like we need to put everyone else first—whether it’s our family, our friends, or our careers. In doing so, we often forget that we are worthy of time, space, growth, and love. Saying yes to yourself means investing in your own potential. It’s about recognising that you don’t have to wait for a perfect moment to chase your dreams or take time for personal growth. Life is far too short to constantly put your needs and desires on hold. Whether it’s pursuing a new career, learning a new hobby, or simply taking a day off to recharge, you deserve to embrace opportunities that will help you become the best version of yourself. It took me 50 years to learn the power of yes, and that after years of struggling with how to say no, and how to say both words without the deep-seated guilt.
Now, we can’t talk about self-care without talking about boundaries, which, as you’ve noticed, is my theme for the month. Saying yes to yourself doesn’t mean saying yes to everything that comes your way. In fact, setting clear boundaries is often the first step toward self-care. It’s about knowing when to say no, when to protect your time, and when to prioritise your well-being. In order to fully appreciate and understand the value of yes, you have to have a solid foundation in saying no to everything that pushes you further and further away from your authentic self. You were not put on this earth to be emotional punching bags and responsibility dumpsters! You are destined to spread your wings and shine.
In all things, balance is key. The ancient philosophy of yin and yang teaches us that opposite forces are interconnected and interdependent. Life itself is a delicate dance between opposing forces—light and dark, work and rest, action and reflection. For every “no,” there has to be a “yes.”
Self-care is no different. We spend so much time learning the power of saying no—whether it’s to people, tasks, or situations that drain us. But just as important as setting boundaries is the ability to open up when the time is right. Embracing that balance is how you achieve equilibrium in life. Saying yes to yourself allows you to experience the other side of living—one that has been waiting for you all along.
Perhaps you’ve been denying yourself a chance to rest, to play, or to feel joy without restraint. By learning to say yes to the parts of life that bring balance, you begin to see a new side of yourself. It’s the side that exists beyond duty, responsibility, and the perpetual sense of sacrifice. It’s the part of you that longs to explore, create, and experience life with full awareness and appreciation. Saying yes! to yourself might just be the doorway to a part of life you’ve been unknowingly neglecting. And once you discover it, you may wonder why you waited so long to embrace it.
I’ll leave you with this mental image: angels have two wings, one for no, and another for yes, both are boundaries, but also essential for flights of the soul. You can’t take off with just one wing.
Related blog entries:
Boundaries: Protecting Your Energy and Prioritising Your Peace
Choosing Self-Care Over Sacrifice in The Year of The Snake
Forgiving Yourself: Embracing Growth, Strength, and the Power to Start Over
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