The most frightening thing about betrayal is that it will never come from your enemies but comes from your friends. (Author unknown)
Just when I thought I could finally breathe and settle down peacefully, a dark shadow from my past emerges. I have known loss in my life, in many forms, but the betrayal of one whom I trusted as a friend, confidante and sister left at a loss for words yesterday.
She threw me under the bus and forced me into a situation I tried so hard to avoid and keep under wraps. Facing the consequences of the betrayal is not even half as bad as the dastardly act itself, or as painful. I feel manipulated, steamrolled and played for a fool, and ended up enduring the wrath of someone who does not know the full context of the situation.
To say that I am at a loss this morning is a gross understatement. When I stepped into the sanctity of my room after work yesterday my first instinct was to sit quietly and listen to mass, pray for strength and guidance. My heart was torn between rage and sorrow, knowing that there is no option for reset and reboot. The human heart just doesn’t work that way when a knife pierces so deeply.
I can do damage control from my end, but after this I am done, so done with her. Karma is a bitch and I hope karma woke up in a foul mood today and slaps someone silly. Why oh why do I keep attracting manipulative people into my life? It is a good argument for withdrawing from society in general and embracing the hermit life.
Sorry to hear you’re going through this. Yuck. So, I have a theory about manipulative people which is this: manipulators do their work on everyone in their orbit, just some people put up with it longer than others. My friend a few years ago asked something similar about the men she dated and wondered if she was attracting them. I thought it was more that she put up with the little BS games far longer than I would have, forgave them or made excuses for them in the early days. Since that conversation, she says she pays more attention to when she senses “red flags” and is more firm with her boundaries. This might totally not relate to your situation, but just wanted to say I don’t think you need to worry that you’re giving out “signals”. Anyway, that’s my theory.